the week

Sunday we rested, it was a great relief.

We made the 9am church service at FCF, the bongo-barefoot guys played again...moving on. Lucy LOVES her class there, it's wonderful to see her hanging out with children and women that love the Lord as much as we do :)


Saturday we went swimming and bought peaches and corn from 2 different farms. The peaches were not ripe enough to eat, I'm so going back to Gardenhour as soon as I have $. The corn as always was fantastic, we froze about 4 gallon baggies and ate about 5 ears a piece :)

Sunday we went to a horse pull at the Wash co ag festival, it was so COOL to see those big guys pulling those loads. Lucy liked it and we got to sit in the shade and relax, very nice :)

Thursday we ate enchiladas at home, WONDERFUL recipe I tweaked, and then headed out to the Washington County Ag Festival again. Goats, Pigs, cows, horses, ducks, chickens, rabbits as big as a small dog, OH MY! We had fun and were running short of $ so we had one ride for daddy and Lucy on the carousel and saw all the animals

Today is Friday and I had the ladies over for a sewing circle with their kids for a playdate, Mrs. Karen watched them for us while we tried to work on our projects. Heather told us about "boot camp" she implemented for her children, I could see a difference in their response to her and her mom. Mothering children is like running a marathon, you have to just keep going and be consistent in your expectations and responses. It's so easy to fail them and so exhausting to do right by them!

We are running about a week and half behind on our $ inflow vs. outflow, we're going to have to seriously buckle down on what we spend for the next month and half to get back on track with savings and cash flow. We were denied for a debt consolidation loan through our bank, our scores are high 700s but our cash flow is not enough they said....sigh. I am praying that the house/kennel sells this year, then that will wipe all our debt out and give us significant savings for a new house, etc.

Unfortunately now is the time for peaches, and all other assorted berries and goodies in our area, so I'm going to have to be frugal in that area. Praying for that house to sell!!

Typing when I should be sleeping

It's 1230am and everyone is asleep, including the baby that usually keeps me up right now.

Sonny's last day at O&A was yesterday and his first day at Tri State is tomorrow, so today was a freebie day....which he used to catch up on work. Sigh.

Well at about 130pm we went to the pool, then we stopped at a farm near the mall for peaches, peppers, tomatoes, and an onion. Then we stopped at the farm stand for corn on 632. The Grab girls were working and Leah told us about a mission trip Salem is going to in 2013 in KY, they need drivers so Leah recruited Sonny. I'm not sure that one is going to happen honestly, but God...  :)

This is the 2nd day in a row for the pool for the girls and I, we went to Amy's pool for TOTS yesterday, so we are a bit toasted. No one burned except me, again, so I am happy. It was ok, Halfway pool seems to be a bit more crowded than Williamsport pool, so of course Sonny was annoyed by all the people there, having to watch our stuff so it didn't get stolen, etc etc. It was a rough around the edges crowd for sure. Can't wait to buy the Wholesome Wear Swim suits next year, wearing a T-shirt is getting old.

Money is extremely tight, surprise. I'm getting good at preserving food via the freezer and cooking with that food to prevent us from going out to eat. However we still eat out more than 1x/week b/c of circumstances that we cannot control (IE baby born going to visit, need to grocery shop as a family b/c I cannot take both girls with me and get a huge amount of food for our 1x/month trip---cannot drive the truck more than 1x/week to make smaller trips with the girls without sonny b/c our gas budget is stretched to the breaking point.... etc etc  etc etc).

Well Wailin is snoring next to me (dog) so it's beyond my bedtime :)

Tired of myself these days, praying that changes, praying that Sonny has a good day at work, and praying that I can keep up with the girls tomorrow and get all my stuff done for a trip down to see my family/new baby on Thurs.

Also praying that I will do what the Lord wants me to do and write those letters He keeps telling me to.

Today is Saturday and we are supposed to rest together as a family, but we keep scheduling things for us to do apart, not so much on purpose but more out of ignorance in the truest sense of the word. I'm coming to the conclusion that if we want to spend even one full day as a family we'll need to deliberately avoid doing one single thing on Saturdays (Yeah I'm not buying it either). Well sucking it up and moving right along...

My niece was born yesterday at 12:03pm, she is gorgeous with a full head of brown hair that has highlights already :)

We ran down to central MD to visit her and parents in the hospital for a short visit after Sonny got off of work. It was a rough, long, medicated (which of course means totally pain-free right? NOT), labor and a very hard 2-3 hours of pushing for my sister, which ended in a very large episiotomy unfortunately . I feel for her and really wish she had read all the books I sent her-signed up for birth classes-done at least the exercises we talked about(!), BUT I have no room to speak, we did the same thing and went completely blind into our first daughter's birth in our local hospital, didn't even know where L&D was. Of course our first delivery turned out to be a medical emergency due to pre-eclampsia and then a NICU stay for baby for breathing difficulties (of course nothing to do with all the pain meds and BP meds they had me on...). Thanks be to God that little Alice had no such problems and is wonderfully and fearfully made and doing great, all 10# of her :)

Finding snippets of time to read my Bible now, which feels good, but like I'm not doing it all the way. I continue to pray for time and energy to complete tasks fully and for the Glory of the Lord, otherwise I'd just as soon leave them honestly and lay on the couch all day long--very true brutal honesty right there.

Mary can turn over and then spin and move a little while on her belly, it's like watching a snail move but she gets somewhere for sure. She decided that the belly position is not something to immediately scream to get rid of and can hold her head up all the way for very long periods.

Lucy has decided that mary is her personal beating post doll and I cannot even take my eyes off of them together while in the same room, and most definetly CANNOT leave them alone together for even a minute anymore. It's frustrating and she is working me to find my weaknesses like the raptors rammed the fence in JP, it's work like nothing I have ever experienced b/c A) I don't want to raise a brat so I must make her submit to me, B) I don't want to hurt her or break her spirit, and C) I'm still feeling out what motivates her to do right b/c it seems to change by the minute sometimes. Most times speaking to her on her level (physical not mental) and explaining in simple detail what I don't want her to do and then following through with a consequence IMMEDIATELY does the trick, other times I must use the 'rod', which is a light weight cheapy cooking spoon (which now Mary has decided it's her fav chewing toy). It's work spanking in love without being angry, especially since if I have to cool down I've completely lost the immediacy of the training and therefore spanking is useless, spanking a 2 yo 10 minutes after the fact is spanking with out understanding in my opinion. I think I've only had to do it about 3 times since she turned 2 1/2, but man she works me mentally every single minute now, it's exhausting. I love her, but now I have to battle feelings that she is getting on my nerves a lot, this is not a good thing for a mama to feel towards her children, they can sense it, they get hurt by it, I should know, that's how I felt my entire childhood, like a burden, in the way, a problem to be dealt with and then sent to watch TV. I refuse to make my children feel that way; when we had our first I said our life will be different, and I am not going to take this for granted, period.

A day in the life

My name is Jamie Garcia and I am 31 years old, a mother to two daughters, 2 yo and 4 months, wife to Sonny Garcia and child of Jesus. That all should have been written the opposite way honestly :)

Today was 90 degrees plus humidity, which is normal here in MD. Lucy and Mary both had decent nights, so I got pretty good sleep for having two young children. Lucy and I woke up and had breakfast while Mary continued to sleep (4 mo). Then we did laundry and I tried to get work done on the computer (just ordering supplies for home, banking, etc I don't work for anyone but my family right now) while Lucy played with the enormous playdough play set that Jenna and Dan got for her last Christmas (my sister and her husband).

Jenna is 37+ weeks pregnant with her first child with Dan, not sure of the baby's gender b/c Dan wanted to wait and Jenna honored his request (which is the first clue to how much Jenna loves and respects him since she is not known for her patience :). Last I checked with my mom she was "only" at 3-4 cent, which any woman that's had more than one child knows the measurements mean nothing in relation to how long labor will be. She unfortunately admitted herself to the hospital when she came in to be monitored for a slightly elevated BP and headache, they gave her fluids again (she got some last week) but they failed to stop the contractions this time. It's so much easier to labor at home, ESP if you want a natural delivery, but it's so hard to talk to women who have never had a baby before. There is BB (Before Baby) and AB (After Baby) women in my opinion, the two have nothing in common when it comes to talking about giving birth honestly. You just cannot give it justice when explaining all that happens and BB women just really don't get it! (neither did I btw). This also goes for having a completely natural birth vs medicated birth, you just cannot explain to each other what birth is like without the other's eyes glazing over (goes for me as well) or back getting up.

Sonny came home on time and we cooked burgers on the grill for the 2nd day in a row with rice. We desperately need to go grocery shopping but I'm waiting on a color cartridge for our printer to show up from amazon.com so I can print out my coupons for Target etc. I'm still struggling with this new experience shopping with coupons, especially since having two small children doesn't exactly give me the time, energy, ease to go to multiple stores. So I must pick the store that will give me the best price via coupons or pricing for that week (we shop about 1-2x/month only...I'm not a fan of shopping 99% of the time) and have everything else that we need so I don't have to make more than one stop. We get our milk, butter, cream, eggs, pork, chicken, cheese, etc etc from Your Family Cow in Chambersburg, PA (Raw, grassfed, organic. no exceptions for our family) and our meat from a longhorn family farm that treats their cows like pets (except they eat some of them!). We buy a 1/4 cow 1x/year and get it for $3/#...that includes steaks which usually go for $12-30/#. They are not registered organic or completely grassfed, but they are trustable, likeable, and dependable, not to mention LOCAL; so it works for us completely! They only give grain in winter as a 'treat' and during the last 1-2 weeks before slaughter to put fat on the cow/steer, the taste is beyond exceptional, even my cheap in-laws love it. :) It's from Columbine Manor, the Palmer family, love Celia and steve.

We did a devotion out of In Touch magazine, right now I cannot even remember what it said honestly.

We are in a holding pattern, slowly sinking...not diving mind you but not keeping the water out either, when it comes to time, energy, will to spend time together.

Sonny got a new job, it will allow him to stay up 1-2 hours later at night, I'm excited to see if we can eek out some family time and couple time for the two of us.

I hope that this blog will be a family diary of sorts, something that we can look back to for kicks and for understanding. I am really aiming to get off of FB completely by the end of the year, if not sooner. The ads and the time I spend on it are alarming. That includes on my phone, I think I will be a much happier person once they stop giving us internet through our walmart track phone plan for free--after the withdrawal period that is. I am seriously considering taking a technology break, go on a diet so to speak. My time is precious and my energy level is low, which makes getting on the net and vegging very ideal most days unfortunately. Then in turn Lucy gets put in front of a DVD too often, Christian but still a movie and not ideal for her time here.

I'm tired and need to change, but change takes energy and a good burst of it to get the enertia started to do a good job of change.

There are a few things that God wants me to do that I just haven't moved on, not that I don't want to do them, just it makes me cry to think about the time and energy that will have to be spent in order to accomplish them. I need to rely on Him more, I need to actively rely on Him more, it takes will power to actively rely on Him and not do it myself. If I don't I am afraid of what consequence I bring on myself and my family. Is this what it means to fear the Lord? I am just not sure.